gah.

"Finally! Warmer weather!"
"No wait.. it's snowing"
"Yes! the snow is melting!"
"Dammit, it's snowing again"
"Please let it all melt this time..."
"Crap, now everything is a frozen, muddy, salty mess"
...good ol' can't-make-up-its-mind-end-of-winter-but-not-quite Toronto weather.

So last week,
Bean had her 9 month check-up.

Sitting quietly, sensing that something is awry...

A brief lived distraction.

...wait, I remember this place now.  Oh cra***

The usual wailing and yelling while the doctor did a quick check 

and confirmed that she is still top chunkster.

*phew* glad that's done.

Nope.  Not done.

Not done at all.

Because Bean had to get blood work done...

And what ensued was the longest 20 minutes of our lives.
She screamed (and flailed) like she'd never screamed before,
and it took 3 lab techs and a very upset mama to hold her down.
Gah.

Post-screaming.  Both of us drenched in sweat.

They had to hold that arm so tight, it bruised the next day,
Double Gah.

training.

A certain someone who refused to eat or sleep today.

Gone are the blissful nights when she used to sleep through til morning,
and we've all been getting less and less sleep over the past couple of months.
I have experienced a whole new level of exhaustion that I never knew existed.
And Bean needs her beauty sleep.
So finally we've started sleep training.
A lot of work but we're seeing some improvement.
eeeeeeeeee (silent squeal of excitement)
*knock on wood*

the fifth... has passed

It's true what they say.

When it rains, it pours.

And we've been so busy running around in the downpour, that we forgot the fifth.

The day our girl turned 9 months old.

In my defence, I remembered the day before, and the day after.

Papa just didn't remember.

But in his defence, he has been extremely busy.

So I'm a little late but:

9 favourite things about my 9 month old.

1. Being greeted with absolute sheer excitement and hugs 

every time I'm out of her line of vision for more than 30 seconds.

2. The look on her face when she's doing something she knows she shouldn't be doing. 

(You can't pull the I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-doing-because-I'm-just-a-baby trick very much longer... Mama is on to you.)

3. When she reaches up to touch my face.
Even if the gentle touch quickly turns into a poke in the eye or a fistful of hair.

4. Nursing.
It was a lot of hard work at the beginning, but the closeness and the bond that I get to experience made the initial leakage, engorgement, almost-mastitis (TMI) and all that fun stuff was totally worth it.
I'm already in slight panic mode that it's almost coming to an end.

5. The rare times when she cries out in her sleep,
and all she needs is to touch my face to fall back asleep.
This has not happened in a while... teething is giving us a serious run for our money.

6. Once upon a time, Bean used to sleep through the night.
And even though I practically drool at the thought of possibly getting back to that place again,
I kind of love it when she clings to me and refuses to let go when I'm trying to put her in bed.
(less so at 4am)

7.  The waves and claps of excitement.

8. Those chunky baby hand high fives.

9. "Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma"
And I'm beginning to think more and more that she actually means ME.
A woo hoo.

"I still can't believe you forgot the fifth."

"Also, does this outfit make my cheeks look big?"

readying.

In preparation for the week ahead...

Aw yeah... stretch it out baby.

Hope we (& you) have a good week.

inside outside.

I haven't been here in a while, but it's been a

"omg-just-when-I thought-it-couldn't-get-busier/more exhausting-life-proves-me-wrong"

kind of few weeks.
Somewhere amongst the blur I had a milestone birthday, but that feels like a long time ago already.
Exhaustion has aged me 5 more years since then.

And just when I thought it's peaked, Bean was unable to sleep last night.

I stopped counting... or lost consciousness after the fourth time I got out of bed.

Some time around 4am (or maybe it was 5...or 6...) I invited myself to a 2 minute pity party and silently cried while trying to rock her back to sleep.

Today, she's the fussiest/clingiest she's ever been and she refused to nap.

Until now.

Less than 2 hours before bed time...
I think she's teething. Or growth spurting.
Maybe both.

But I'm not here today to bitch (even though I totally just did)

I wanted to make note that my girl is 38 weeks old today.

Which means that she's been on the "outside" for a week longer than she's been on the "inside".

"it's already been 38 weeks?"

"it's ONLY been 38 weeks?"

"holy crap, pregnancy is long. (and mine was 3 weeks short!)"

"I still can't believe I grew a(this) human being."

My amazing little human bean being.

a very non-anti-valentine.

Am I seriously STILL talking about Valentines 2 (technically 3) days later?!
Forgive me, I would've written sooner but the wifi in our entire neighbourhood had crapped out
and the amAHzing internet provider fixed the issue in an incredibly untimely manner.
So it's them.  Not me.
But I digress.

We were never the type to make a big deal of Valentines day. 

Sure, we've had cards and baked goods, but shouldn't we love and appreciate 

our significant other every day?

(somebody remind me of that the next time I'm yelling at SP 

or telling him to go away cause he's crowding my "space")

That being said, since our lives have gotten considerably busier (understatement),

and we have not even had a date night in 8 months,

I think it's become more important for us to make a "bigger deal".

So this was us.
Making a bigger deal.

My mornings are always so busy, it took a good few hours before I even noticed this.
On a lunch date with the culprit of my busyness.
I really do have a knack for finding the most inappropriately appropriate cards...
Hershey's - the key to SP's stomach heart - and other random gifts.
Waiting on papa for our family dinner date.
By the time he came, she was too busy with crackers to care.
Feeding our Chipotle addiction.
Clearly, it was a very romantic dinner.
And last but not least, the Cupcake Shoppe.  We'll take any excuse to have these. Thank you.

Hope you had a great Valentines too.
If you celebrate that kind of thing.

little valentine.

Wishing you a Happy Valentines Day.